Anyone in a relationship would agree that it takes hard work and commitment to keep it going, well when it comes to a Long distance relationship, the level of hard work and commitment needed is so much more than a regular relationship, that’s why a lot of people don’t even bother going into one in the first place.
Today, I’ll be sharing a little bit about how it was to be in a long distance relationship and some tips I think can help you thrive in one.
But first, I’ll give you a little background into our story…
Before my hubby (Oprite) and I officially met and eventually became friends, we were both in the same school but different campuses (Boarding and Day School). I was in the day school, while he was boarding and the only time our campuses came together was either when the school had the annual Inter-House Sports or Prize-Giving day.
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Even though we went to the same school, we didn’t ever speak to each other until a year after school (which was in 2010) when a mutual friend of ours introduced us on 2go (lol who else used this app back in the day?). We were both in different relationships at the time but eventually, we both ended those relationships. His relationship ended due to some uncontrollable circumstances, while mine ended because it was “COMPLICATED” (well I still don’t know exactly why it ended but that’s a story for another day).
Anyway, our friendship grew really fast and we could spend hours just chatting about life or our various relationships at the time. It was so easy talking to Oprite and it was also refreshing to know that there were still decent guys out there, that you could just be friends with, without them asking for more.
In 2012, he was to leave the country to start his undergrad and I remember how bad I felt because I thought that our friendship would end or we’d communicate less since he’d be busy with school and trying to adjust to his new life but we still promised each other that we’ll try and keep in touch. After he left, the communication level died down a bit, we weren’t talking as much as we used to.
By the way, at this point, he had ended his relationship with his girlfriend and I was still in limbo with my complicated relationship. All I could wish for at that time was that my boyfriend could at least possess half of the character Oprite had (lol that wish didn’t come true).
Fast forward to 2013, while I was taking an afternoon nap, Oprite decided to send me a message asking me to be his girlfriend. I woke up to this message and thought I was in some sort of dream or that someone took his phone and was playing a prank on me. Reasons being that before now I knew we’ve had this conversation and he was with the mindset that he wasn’t ready to commit to any relationship even though we both knew that we’ve started developing feelings for each other.
Would you believe that I said “No” to him? Well, I did at first until he decided to make a video to give me the reasons why I should say NO and the reasons why I should say YES, like Pros and Cons. I could see this guy was serious, and he wasn’t going to take No for an answer. So after weighing the Pros and the Cons, I eventually said “Yes” on the 15th of October, 2013 (which was 3 days after he asked me).
So we were official. What were our plans to make this work? Since we lived on different Continents, we talked through it and came up with some rules because we knew that we wanted to put in the effort to actually make this work, which we obviously did 😊
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My hubby put together a short book detailing the rules we set that made our relationship work and how you can do the same. Click here to download it if you want to learn more. In the book, he explains tips to help you thrive in your long distance relationship.
Here are some of the Challenges and Benefits of being in a Long Distance Relationship…
♦ CHALLENGES OF LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
• It Makes You Overly Sensitive
• It Requires More Effort
♦ BENEFITS OF LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP
• It Tests Your Level Of Commitment.
• It Reveals Your Strength And Weakness.
• It Shows How Strong The Foundation Of The Relationship Is
• It Allows You To Appreciate Your Partner More.
Overall, putting God first was the highlight of our relationship and I remember how we came up with a daily ritual or routine of always praying before going to bed no matter what we are doing (On the phone, video calls or voice notes even). This action may be small to some persons but it was the foundation we needed to draw us closer to God and to also build our faith in him.
Having a Clear Vision and End Goal will definitely give you something to hope which in the long run also gives you a sense of direction. We both knew that we wanted to get married in the future and that was our goal and from my previous relationship(which ended without an actual explanation) I had learnt my lesson about this point.
So when you’re starting another one, you just want to make everything clear, put everything on the table. This is what I want, this is what you want”, it makes everything clear for both of you.
Was this post helpful in any way? Have you ever been in a Long distance relationship before? If you have, what was your experience like? Would you like me to share more relationship tips from my experiences? I’d love to know in the comment box. Till next time
Loads of Love❤❤❤